What crying has taught me.

Never Be Ashamed of Your Tears //  words by Throwing Pinecones

I cry a lot. Or, at least it felt like a lot…

I felt as though I was at total surrender to my tears. I felt weak and insignificant. I would mop up my tears with my mascara stained hand as if I was trying to shove them back into my eyes.

I was tired of apologizing over and over because of how silly I felt for loosing control of my tear ducts. I tried to cope with how I deal with stress and anger through pages and pages of journal entires, but I just couldn’t. I would fall on my knees and beg God to just take them away from me, but He never did.

I remember getting scolded as a child for apologizing for crying so much, and it sent me into a frenzy! My parents were as confused as I was. I don’t blame them at all, we were all a mess.

I remember thinking about how I couldn’t wait to grow up, because I thought it would get better as I got older. How wrong was I!

I have spent several nights with my husband, Brian, crying over the silliest of things. But really, it didn’t matter whether the topic we were discussing was worthy of crying about or not, I still felt worthless.

Brian has never gotten angry at me for crying. He has never scolded me. He never bombarded me with questions, he understood something I never could. Sure he has been confused and felt a bit lost and asked me over and over “what’s wrong?”, but his wife is sitting in front of him crying her eyes out! I don’t blame him at all.

Brian would spend most of the time trying to reassure me of my value. He told me that even with eyeliner down to my chin I was beautiful. He told me that he will always love me and more importantly that God has always loves me, and always will. Despite my tears, and how insignificant I felt, he loved me to the core. He reminded me of my worth again and again. This is where healing began.

Brian has taught me something I believe my parents had always tried to. He taught me that crying is just a part of who I am, and that it is okay. I don’t need to apologize because of who I am. Of course God wasn’t going to take away my tears, he gave them to me.

He knew, even if not at first, that my tears are just how I cope with the ups and downs of life. It’s how I process, grieve and work through things. That is okay, there is value in that!

Brian takes the time to listen to me through my tears and confusion. He lets me talk it out and engages in that conversation. He let’s me grow through my tears.

As I have gotten older it has (finally) gotten easier, but not on my accord. While I was on my knees praying to God that He would take my tears away, He had a better plan.

A plan that would require me to be patient. A plan that would take time. A plan that would heal me in a way I never thought I would experience. He planned to give me Brian.

A man who IS patient, who takes the TIME and genuinely loves me for me, tears and all. A man who brings the focus back to God and back to his plans. A man who, even when he doesn’t understand a single thing that is going through my head, is willing to sit up with me until 2am to figure it out.

So, today I am grateful for my tears. I am grateful for this challenge and I am grateful for the God who gave them to me.

Life is tough ladies, we all know this to be true. Focus your efforts on God and I guarantee you, you won’t be disappointed you did.

Jesus loves you, Jesus wept and Jesus has been there – let him be there with you now.

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Shared Minute // Week 9

shared minute photo challenge

The idea behind Shared Minute is simple: to make this great big world just a bit smaller. It is about real lives influencing and inspiring real people. It is about living just one little minute in the life of another.

The Rules Guidelines

1) Set your alarms for just before 6:00 pm PST (consider your time zone!)

2) Snap a photo of whatever it is you’re doing. Washing the dishes after dinner? Giving your little one a bath? At work? Shopping? Doing school work? Whatever it is, share it!

3) Share it on Instagram using the hashtag #SharedMinute and tell us what you are up to that day!

Every week I will feature some of my favorite shared minutes here on Throwing Pinecones, giving YOU all the credit of course! If you are not already following me on Instagram you can find me @mrsdustyroad and keep up with the latest @SharedMinute.

Here are some of my favorites from this week! (click on the photo to see who it came from)

Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-2 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-3 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-7  Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-5 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-8 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-6 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones-9 Shared MInute Photo Challenge by Throwing Pinecones

What do you say? Are you going to join #SharedMinute?

See you tonight at 6:00pm pst!

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A Godly Lady

Let me start by saying that your reputation does matter. It matters a great deal more than you think. You are not only representing yourself by the way you act, but also your Father in heaven. Your reputation is directly determined by your character, and your character is directly valued by your creator.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.” Proverbs 31:30

A Godly Lady by Throwing Pinecones-2

Her priority is to love God and make him known.

To love God means more than just admiring Him or caring a great deal for Him. To love God is to respect Him, obey Him and trust Him. “We know we love God’s children if we love God and obey his commandments. Loving God means keeping his commandments, and his commandments are not burdensome.” 1 John 5:2-3

Your love for God should be so loud that it influences every word you say, every decision you make down to every piece of fabric you clothe yourself with. It’s gut check time, darling. Is your priority to Love God and make Him known? Can other people see this love you profess?

She is both gentle and strong.

I have a hard time with the being told that as a woman I am to be gentle, of all things. I have four brothers, two dads and a husband and you want me to be gentle!? I wrote about this struggle here in my series on vulnerability. (that I plan on finishing someday!)

Someone once said to me that, “being gentle is simply having strength under control”. These are words that bring me such comfort! If I am honest I am having a hard time understanding exactly what it means to be gentle and how to have a gentle spirit. For now I will simply trust God’s sweet words and I hold tightly to their truth.

Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.” 1 Peter 3:3-4

She is wise.

“When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.” Proverbs 31:26

Let’s not confuse wisdom with knowledge. Knowledge comes through books, lectures and tutorials. Wisdom comes from God-ordained experiences. It comes from living life in complete surrender to God’s perfect plan. It comes from reading His words and putting them into practice.

The beauty of wisdom is while you can not simply be given knowledge you CAN be given wisdom. God wants you to crave His wisdom, he wants you to ask Him for it. If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind.” James 1:5-6

She is generous.

She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy. Proverbs 31:20

All to often I think I can not give because I have no money to give. Proverbs 31:20 does not speak even a word about money! As women of God our hearts are ones that are to be soaked in generosity. We should gladly give our time, efforts and recourses to help those God have placed in our lives.

Her hands work eagerly and diligently.

She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness. Proverbs 31:27

Don’t be a woman known for taking the easy way out. When you are given a task, when you make a promise or when you offer to help follow through and do so eagerly.

She is valued and respected.

When you act like a women your husband, and more importantly your Father in heaven, can be proud of it will certainly not go unnoticed! Carry yourself in a way that people can look up to you and see Jesus through and through.

“Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.” Proverbs 31:31

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DIY Hanging Planter

DIY hanging planters by Throwing Pinecones

In my ideal habitat I am surrounded by beautiful foliage, blossoms and houseplants! I just love them. My husband and I budget out what we call “fun money” that we can spend on whatever our little hearts desire. In the last two weeks I have spent every penny on house plants, and I am not even ashamed!

While on my Pintrest the other day I found this perfect DIY to make a hanging planter. The tutorial is just so perfect I will let the experts keep at it! You can find the tutorial here.

My Indoor Garden Board on Pinterest.

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My Thoughts on Success and Finding Yourself

My Thoughts on Success and Finding Yourself by Throwing Pinecones

I remember being in high school and feeling the pressure of what comes next. Graduation, freedom, college, bills and big decisions. People all around me, young and old, wanted to know what my plan was. They would ask me the same thing over and over.

“What are you going to be when you grow up?”

The answer they were looking for was not one I was going to give. These people wanted to know what career I was going to pursue, though that is not what they asked.

I understand their heart was to engage in my future and I genuinely appreciated that. However, it is sad to me to suggest that my career is who I am or who I will be. To word that question like that suggests that I am nothing, but that after college and a career that I will soon be something. That only then I will be “successful.”

What a lie! We are told that after high school the next step is college. That isn’t true for everyone! While college has its place and we are so very blessed to live in a culture where knowledge is so accessible, it is not the path for everyone, and is certainly does not define you.

So, then, if I may be so bold, who are you?

Sunday school tells us we should answer with a confident “I am a child of God.” Yes, you are, but is that all? I am not looking for a vague answer. I demand specifics.

You are not your passions. You are not your dreams, goals or plans. You are not your past, present or even future. You are, above all else, God’s. You belong solely to Him.

You have been redeemed, forgiven and are now free. You are a citizen of heaven, a disciple of Christ and a role model for the lost. You have purpose and a path designed by God himself.

While you are not your passions and dreams, you are unique and I pray that you embrace that! God has inspired in you those passions and dreams for a very specific purpose, it would be foolish to think otherwise.

The word inspired is a translation of the Greek word theopneustos, meaning God-breathed. Thus the origin of Scripture is God, not man; it is God-breathed. The second verse, 2 Peter 1:21, says, “For no prophecy was ever made by an act of human will, but men moved by the Holy Spirit spoke from God.” source

In the same way scripture is god-breathed, so are you. “And the LORD God had formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature.” Genesis 2:7

You are unique. Your maker made you that way. With unique goals, dreams, passions, personality and preferences. I challenge you to celebrate this uniqueness by exercising them to glorify your maker! 

There is a big difference between finding yourself and defining yourself. You are already you. There is no searching to do. You are God’s. God breathed the breath of life into your lungs and created you with the potential to be truly beautiful.

He is the potter and you are the clay. Do you want to stay as mere clay? Or will you allow God to define you? Will you allow Him to sculpt you? Will you allow your maker to finish the project he has started? A project he has sacrificed his own Son for?

You must submit to your maker, please let him love you. You have to be vulnerable to the potter to ever live to your potential, and what potential you have!

“God loves you the way you are, but he loves you so much that he doesn’t want you to stay that way.” Speaker Jon Foreman

What does it mean to be a child of God? Why would I want to be a child of God? How can I submit to the potter? How can I be sculpted this week?

Let me remind you that you are beautiful because God made you beautiful, and you are loved because God loves you. Live beautifully and make your maker proud.

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I Need Your Opinion!

TP - logo w-o blog (black)

I could use your help! As I get more focused on my blog I would really love to hear what you ladies want to read. My mission is to create a safe place for women to get real answers to tough questions. With this in mind please selected to post topics that you would like to see the most of.

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8 Tips for a Better Period

8 tips for a better period by ThrowingPinecones.com We all know the feeling; the achy, nauseous, I-really-just-want-to-cry-and-yell-simultaneously sort of general yuck that comes with periods. It sucks. There is no better way to say it, they just suck. I have learned some valuable tips to make this monthly “gift” much, much more bearable.

1. Strawberries

Yep, you read that right, strawberries! Yummy, red, juicy strawberries. The fiber, vitamins and minerals help to prevent cramps. When I know my period is coming I can be found eating so many strawberries. Even during my period they help. It’s like magic. Sometimes I feel like they help better than medicine does. If you’re not a strawberry kind of person try raspberries, pears, apples, boysenberries, grapefruit or dried apricots. Here are some other foods that help prevent or fight menstrual cramps.

2. Ginger and Cinnamon

I love ginger ale and ginger beer, it is just so good! Turns out it also helps with nausea and upset-stomach and its scientifically proven! My grandma used to make me a warm cup of ginger tea when my period started to get unbearable. The warmth of the tea and the healing powers of ginger always make me feel so much better. Cinnamon helps with cramps (as well as these things). Just trust me, it’s magic! I always add extra to my applesauce or oatmeal. Personally, I have found cinnamon tea by Harney and Sons to be the most helpful and I do my best to constantly be eating it to help prevent cramps. 

3. Heat Packs

I have heard this one for ever and only recently started to use this handy trick. (I am not sure why it took me so long!) You can use a regular heat-in-the-microwave kind of heat pack or an adhesive ThermaCare patch. I like using the patches when I know I am going to be in the car for a long time, at work or really just any day. They are wonderful because they aren’t visible at all (as the are worn under your clothes) and the heat lasts for around eight hours.

4. Sleep and Water

I realize these are sort of obvious ones, but let’s be real, they are easy to forget. Water is so, so important and it is a commodity we ofter overlook. Carry around a pretty water bottle if it helps you to remember or even look into the several apps that are made to remind you to drink water. I don’t know about you but during my period I feel incredibly fatigued; even the simplest of tasks wipe me out. Let yourself take a nap! Sleep if your bodies way of reenergizing, so let it do so!

5. Exercise

Light exercise helps with all the aches and pains that come with menstruation. If you can muster the strength to go on a light jog or brisk walk your endorphin levels raise and help with circulation and eases muscle tension. Yoga or even just some simple stretching can do wonders for aches and pains that go with our periods like backaches and sore legs.

6. Le Parcel

photo cred: www.leparcel.com
photo cred: http://www.leparcel.com | click photo to view website

Le Parcel is something I have been wanting to get on board with for quiet a while. It’s pure genius really.

*I was not paid to feature Le Parcel, I just believe in what they are doing!

7. Tracking Your Period

I wrote a whole post all about the benefits of tracking your period, check it out here.

8. Things to Avoid

  • Caffeine – Sad, I know, but caffeine increases the tension in your body.
  • Alcohol – Increases bloating and blood flow and occasionally the pain of cramps
  • Fatty/Junk Foods/Carbonated Drinks – Make you feel all around yucky and bloated. Your body is literally having a break down! Be nice to it a give yourself something healthy!
  • Watching The Notebook for the first time in the dark in the midst of the worst period ever. Needless to say I was a mess.

Here are several other helpful remedies for menstrual cramps. I have tried most of them and confidently report to you that they really work! Do you have any unique remedies for cramps?

P.S. Please keep in mind I am no doctor, I am just a girl who really, really hurts once a month!

*UPDATED Mach 9, 2015*
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